Got a feeling that someone you know or care about it isn’t behaving as they normally would? Perhaps they seem out of sorts? More agitated or withdrawn? Or they’re just not themselves. Trust that gut instinct and act on it.

A Conversation Change a life

R U OK? inspire and empower everyone to meaningfully connect with the  people around them and start a conversation with those in their world who may be struggling with life.

You don’t need to be an expert to reach out – just a good friend and a great listener.

Use these four steps and have a conversation that could change a life:

1. Ask R U OK?
2. Listen
3. Encourage action
4. Check in

“I really feel someone I know is in a dire state and is about to do something they won’t come back from. What do I do?!”

If general questions yield vague responses, asking these questions as opposed to “Have you considered self harm?” or “Are you thinking of suicide” (due to the taboo/stigma on the word “suicide”) will help you gain a more honest answer:

1. Are you thinking of killing yourself?
2. Have you made plans to take your life?
3. Do you have the means?

If they answer yes to any or all of these questions:

• Ask: “What have you done in the past to manage similar situations?”
• Ask: “How would you like me to support you?”
• Ask: “What’s something you can do for yourself right now? Something that’s enjoyable or relaxing?”
• You could say: “When I was going through a difficult time, I tried this… You might find it useful too.”
• If they’ve been feeling really down for more than 2 weeks, encourage them to see a health professional. You could say, “It might be useful to link in with someone who can support you. I’m happy to assist you to find the right person to talk to.”
• Be positive about the role of professionals in getting through tough times.

IF THEY NEED EXPERT HELP

Some conversations are too big for family and friends to take on alone. If someone’s been really low for more than 2 weeks – or is at risk – please contact a professional as soon as you can.

FIND EXPERT HELP >>

Follow up

• Pop a reminder in your diary to call them in a couple of weeks. If they’re really struggling, follow up with them sooner.
• You could say: “I’ve been thinking of you and wanted to know how you’ve been going since we last chatted.”
• Ask if they’ve found a better way to manage the situation. If they haven’t done anything, don’t judge them. They might just need someone to listen to them for the moment.
• Stay in touch and be there for them. Genuine care and concern can make a real difference